I was really tired today. I now know that my Procrastination is apart of my depression. Depression is something i have been fighting against for most of my life. Something that sometimes hits me like a tidle wave. Most of the time its just ripples which are easier to deal with.
I live the life of a very positive person, but sometimes i have off days, and today was one of those. I think all the pressure of the bullying that i have been experiencing lately and the fact that my brand new second hand juicer blew up this morning, tipped me over the edge. It is funny how you work up something in your mind, which for me today was to come home and have a fresh celery, apple and pear juice. Only to have it go pear shape. I battled on, threw it all in the bin and decided to buy a brand new juicer. It was enough to get me into my gym gear.
Seeing as task, 1. Was to go to the gym and do one class. Pilates was my chosen class, i am really enjoying the feeling of stretching my body and doing different routines. I also love that i can wear my ugg boots to the class. Bogan i know but they are comfortable in the winter.🧘♀️🧦
Task 2 was to clean up my office, but when i came home it all hit me and i had to lay down. A good cry and a little nap. Being aware of how i am tracking with my mental health is very important, not only for myself but those around me too. Naps and tears are somtimes very cleansing. Being good to myself is the key to moving forward.
I got up after about an hour and had a shower, a little bit of chocolate and looked at my task 3 which was to write some more of my “two little wombats”, but my mind was blank, i couldn’t get my brain around it, so i went back to task 2, which was to clean up my office.
The top photo shows my office as it would look like if it was a Chinese laundry. Everything always seems to get piled up in there. Its my space with my quirky likes, with my books, my records, my antique cupboards and my things i have collected over my life. My fiancee has a little bit of space in there, but primarily its my space. Its where i like to write to get my thoughts out.
Today has been a mental health day. I am glad that i recognise when i am running low, instead of letting my ego run me raggered and it all becoming messy again. Its nice that since i started doing my tasks, i am getting to the gym more. Finding the balabce in life is the key to finding your true happyness.
Tomorrow i am spending a part of the day in the hospital while my fiancee has the screws removed from his ankle. When its healed he will be able to dance better at our wedding. 👰🤵
So my tasks tomorrow are to
1. Do some writing, seeing as i have time to kill.
2. Go to the fruit shop and buy some good quality fruit and veg, at a good price. (This particular shop is located in the major shopping center and i dont usually like paying for parking.), but they do have good specials.
3. Set out a menu for the next two weeks so that i am not wondering what to cook for tea everynight. I would like to get into the practice of this so that my shopping bill is smaller.
Happy hump day everyone. Remember to look after your mental health first, before you tackle any big plans. Giving yourself small goals helps to keep us going. Xx