Happy hump day every one.
I love helping others, but i am quickly learning again, to become neutral in other social situations. For most of my adult life, before the breakdown, i was the one everyone come to for advice or to vent and i could stand within a crowd of people who were gossiping and not be effected by it, but i have been effected.
I have always thought of myself as Switzerland during the war, neutral territory. I do not take sides and i dont usually offer an opion, unless asked. I have decided to put up that wall again, just to protect myself, many years ago in my early sobriety, i wrote a story about what it was like to be a sober person living in the world of other’s who are not like me.
In the story i likened my protective shell that i have around me to that of a glass jar. I can see everything, can feel everything, could hear everything, but not anyone else can see my shell. It one of those stories written on paper, before i had a computer or a tablet, or even a mobile phone, to keep it safe and now its lost. A small regret that i do not have it anymore.
My shell has gotten very fragil over the years, but from doing this blog every day it is helping to strengthen my glass shell.
Learning not to Procrastinate is giving me strength, its giving me purpose, its giving me hope.
Task 1. Was to go to the gym, which i am happy to say is nearly every day since i started doing this challenge. I was going walking with a friend today, but she was unwell, and i was lucky enough to get into hot yoga and pilates with my favorite teacher, which is sometimes difficult as its a small class size and usually fills up fast. My higher power looking after me. 😏😁
Task 2. Was to get back into doing my life coaching study. After my two hour, two class session at the gym, i came home, had a shower, some lunch and did my load of towels, before i put my dressing gown on, for a bit extra warmth and headed into my office to do some study. I turned on my computer, it didn’t want to work as usual.( its going to the tip) Instead of getting stroppy about it, i got my tablet and settled in for a couple of hours study. All a bit boring, as its a lecture recorded for me to listen to, her voice is a bit boring, but i am closer to achieving a dream that i have had since my twenties, when i first heard about Tony Robbins and life coaching.
Task 3. Was to make a meal list, i sat down with my fiancee to do the list, and he said he wants to go shopping with me, so we will do that over the weekend. We used to go to the local markets to do our shopping, but as usual life got in the way. Excuses and things.
No more excuses, no more Procrastination.
Tomorrow is meant to be a terrible day. Rain rain and more rain is forecasted. Not always fun, when you are meant to be walking and talking in the morning, working in the afternoon and yoga in the evening.
I will keep my tasks light tomorrow.
1. Listen to more of my study while i am driving. I love technology for somethings. Though i do think we are being over taken and not enjoying life as much as we used to, pre internet.
2. Meditate for half an hour. Recharge and strengthen my glass shell.
3. Try to get some more writting of my story done.
Good night everyone. Xxxx