Pain is not always our friend. We push it down, hide from it. But it always surfaces, when we lest expect it.
If we do not face it head on, learn to deal with it, it will continue to resurface time and time again. It will actually get bigger and bigger until, POOF, its your life.
It will become so ingrained into your existence, that when you experience true happiness it will affect you like someone who has rarely be touched by pain. It’s shocking and terrifying.
Pain is something i have hidden from, hidden behind and push to the background behind my addictive personality.
But everytime i have faced pain, real pain like tonight when i endured a 45 minute exercise class that was a follow up from last nights dynamic pilates, after being completely lazy for the last couple of months, i smiled, shook my head and went deeper. I faced it head on and barely walked out of that training room, but walked out with my head held high, because i hadn’t let my procrastination brain tell me to stop.
What was my motivation?, my lightbulb moment?
I went for my first wedding dress fitting and while i still felt beautiful in my dress, i realised i hadn’t been true to myself and that i had lied to myself about how much work i really need to do to get myself back into shape.
Life is funny like that, my higher power giving me the little kick in the arse i sometimes need.